Self-Care

"I grow in my ability to relate to others when I allow them to be exactly as they are. The greatest gift I can give to myself is my own attention."

"We are best able to help others when we ourselves have learned the way to achieve serenity."

These are two great quotes that I looked up today because currently the biggest obstacle to my recovery is my relationship with myself. I have unreasonably high expectations of myself and then feel terrible when I can't meet them. I switch seamlessly between the roles of overbearing parent and guilt-stricken child. What a curious and insane adaptation to have developed!!

Most of the literature reminds me to devote some time everyday to me. I can accept and even love myself by learning to let go. I can accept and love me by remembering to look at myself the same way I look at everyone else.

I go to the gym with a close friend about 4 times a week. I never cancel because I would consider it a lazy and worthless thing to do. But it's so funny that when he has to cancel, I never level the same accusations at him. I just assume that he has something else he needs to do. Why do I expect so much more of myself than I do of others? So today I cancelled and am blogging instead. What a wonderful relief!

I think that the golden rule can also work in the opposite direction. I am going to start treating myself the way I would treat others.